you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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