can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
