I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
