New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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