I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
