just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize
