But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
