Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Randomize
