remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
