It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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