I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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