you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
