I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Two words: nipple clamps
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