Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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