I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize