yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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