is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
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