brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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