i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
