I accidentally had phone sex last night
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
