her vagine was all disorganized.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize