garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
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