she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
