some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize