your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I fill condoms, not promises.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
