New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
