Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
