I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
