I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
