My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
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