you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize