I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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