it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
