Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
All I want is dick and wine.
Randomize
