that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i used baking grease as lip gloss
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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