I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
