almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
