If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
