Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
