so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
