I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize