so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
