i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
