i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
