Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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