I need help removing her.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
