I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
