nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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