Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
