Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
