Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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