I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize
